Well, it’s a month until New Year’s Resolutions. That means it’s a month and a day before broken New Year’s Resolutions.
I know, I know, I’m cynical. I speak from years of experience. I’ve made and broken so many New Year’s Resolutions. Why? For oh so many reasons:
- I’m too vague. Be happier seemed like a reasonable enough resolution. But what does happier mean? And how do I know I’ve gotten there? I mean, depending on the time of day, I might be happier, or I might not. So which wins?
- I shoot too high. For 2013, I made a resolution to read a book every week. 52 books in a year. I even put my goal onto Goodreads so that I could track it and see my progress. As of November 30, I had read 19. Goodreads has kindly pointed out to me that I am only 37% of the way toward my goal, I am 55% behind schedule, and I need to read 28 books to get on schedule. The sad thing is, I’ve read more this year than last year, which is what I was trying to do. But I look like I’m unsuccessful based on the overly ambitious goal I made.
- I don’t figure out how to fulfill the resolution. There have been so many times I’ve made the goal to lose x number of pounds, but I don’t figure out how to make it happen.
- I’m not honest with myself. I just did it, and I do it every time I make losing weight a resolution. The real reason that one hasn’t worked is…
- I didn’t want to do what it takes to fulfill the goal. I’m a chocoholic. I drink a lot of soda. And don’t get me started on BBQ potato chips. Seriously, don’t get me started. I’m willing to eat through the bag when I get started. I know darn well what it takes to lose weight, and I tell myself all of the steps I will take to achieve my goal. Until it’s donut day at work. Or until I see those Caramel Milky Ways at the drugstore. The list goes on and on.
So, why do I keep trying over and over again? Blame people like Theodore Roosevelt, who said: It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed. Or Thomas Edison: I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work. Or H.G.Wells: If you fell down yesterday, stand up today.
Then again, it may just be because I’m stubborn.
But then there are the words of Albert Einstein to consider:Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. Wise words, true, but how do you figure out what to do differently that might help? I’d been hitting my head against the wall for so long, but I’ve recently read some advice that might help.
Then I read an article by James Clear that turned around my perspective. Instead of focusing on a big end goal, try focusing on the habits that get you to that goal. And the piece of advice that really stuck out was to make habits incredibly easy to start. Don’t make big lofty goals – make small goals that are so that you have a hard time saying no.
I’m using that philosophy to resume my exercising. I have a nice notebook of exercises I’m supposed to do 5 times a week to improve my flexibility and ease my spasticity. Supposed to is the key phrase. Logically I know it would improve my life to exercise regularly, but making that a regular habit has been another story. But when I try to get going again, I’ll either strain a muscle doing too much too soon or I’ll find plenty of excuses why I can’t do it on day 2. So now I’m doing a teeny tiny habit to get started. I will do one set of one exercise.
Day 1 – I did one set. Good start.
Day 2 – I had the following internal conversation.
Evil me: I don’t wanna exercise today.
Not as evil me: Oh come on, it’s the second day, we can do it.
Evil me: I still don’t wanna.
Not as evil me: You realize that it would take us less time to do one set than it would to argue about it, don’t you?
Evil me stormed over to a corner to sulk.
Day 3 and 4 – Thanksgiving holiday. And family stuck around for an extra day. Neither day was a good habit day.
Day 5 – Another internal conversation.
Evil me: Nyah, nyah. Yet another screw up. We blew it again. Let’s go eat some junk food.
Not so evil me: Haven’t you ever heard of a holiday? After all, we’re going to the office on Monday, even though we took Thursday and Friday off.
Evil me sulked again while I did a set of squats.
So instead of focusing on running a 26.2 mile marathon, I’m just focusing on my next step.
BlogHer encourages bloggers by hosting National Blog Posting Month (aka NaBloPoMo). December’s theme is More or Less. I’ve had the noble intentions in previous months to post daily, and well, setting the goal to post 31/30 (even 28) straight days has been more than I’ve been able to do. So that’s another place I’m focusing on less. Just focus on publishing one post. After that, I can focusing on publishing one more post. Bit by bit, putting it together.
